Should I or shouldn't I?

Well, I am debating on driving home this weekend. I have Labor Day off...While I could use the rest...and the not spending any money aspect...I want to drive home to see Kurt. See here is my OCD kicking in. We spoke for a couple of hours Sunday. He told me he was having confused feelings about us being together a few weeks ago. The girl "T" that broke his heart has been calling him and asking him if they can work things out. Well, he went on to tell me he has not slept with her...He was planning on moving in together...But no sex yet...See what I mean about his feelings and sex they are sooooo entwined...He is really guarded for a guy. This is a turn on factor for me! Most guys are the total opposite. Well, he said even though they were broken up totally when we were together he felt guilty towards both of us.


I am asking myself...Do I want to go home have a relaxing weekend w/ mom, dad, Dawn and Kurt? Or will I only have feelings of despair after I spend an evening with him and see the pain in his eyes? He can't give me what I need right now....but he can give me what I WANT right now. On one hand if I go...he'll have to think of me...and if I stay here he'll think of her. So what do I do????

Today was the one year anniversary of Katrina (that bitch gave new Orleans one hell of a blow job)

FEMA

Do I really have to get up, function and teach tomorrow? I took a co-worker out to dinner this evening. She is recently divorced and her daughter just moved out to go to college. It's her birthday today and she was feeling really low.

I am still a tad bit growling on the different prep classes....but 2 is better than 3. I am really thinking of N'Awlins as tomorrow (Tues) is the one yr anniversary of Katrina. So many news programs are reliving the devastation. It saddens me to see how very LITTLE the government had given in the form of immediate and continuous relief. People should not still be living in FEMA (Fix everything my ass) trailers...and trying to make ends meet. How can we give so much to other countries and forget about our own?

I'm homesick and sad at the same time. Pray for the people who are still trying to rebuild their homes and attempting to make another life for themselves. Gutting homes, treating the frames for mold, gathering debris and trying to salavge their sanity in the process is hard.

Better

OK. I am feeling a bit better, still not thrilled but better. I just spent my entire planning on scheduling. I am now teaching 3 Lit classes and 2 Grammar classes. Hey, last night I thought I would have #3 preps for classes. I wanted to lose my mind. I am not thrilled about Grammar...but it's still Language Arts and easier to plan.

I also spent 2 hours on the phone with Kurt last night some news....T has been calling him. She is in Nebraska...and wanting to try to work things out...that kinda bums me out. So send them bad vibes...Ok well I want him to be happy, but I'd rather him be happy with ME. I am still trying to decide if I will drive home this weekend. He's not sure if he's working Monday..If he is I'm not going. If he continues to talk to her, then I don't need to go....Feedback???

Yikes, have I stepped over the line...I saw RM (the married teacher here that I have always had a crush on)...and fussed at him as to why he didn't sing or dance for me last Friday ...he said why what am I missing? I said "What am I missing I thought maybe you would even do a strip tease for me. " He laughed and said I am an old man...you do not want me to do a dance like that I am an old man....I went on to say well, maybe your wife wouldn't approve. Yes, I think I went WAY out on a limb....I've lost my mind. I had to do something that made me laugh after all the shit I dealt with this weekend. GRRRRRR

FUCK

I want to quit my job after this last week and move back to New Orleans. I don't think I have ever hated my life as much as I do right now.They want me to teach...3 classes of Literature. co teach a grammer class and co teach a history class....Can you see my lesson plans and FRUSTRATION NOW?????


I am seriously asking God WHY AM I HERE???? OK to my pillow and tears....

B'day

Well, I'm home from school. My feet are killing me! My kids danced and sang today, Reading lyrics is singing! SO i put them in groups and they sang "Good TImes" by Chic, YMCA by the Village People, RESPECT by Aretha Franklin, and We are Family by Sister Sledge. They had a good time, some better than others.

I grabbed my cell phone once I got in my car. I had several messages..there was a simple birthday wish from John--the LOVE of my life--and I just burst into tears. My God do I miss him.

I need to go freshen up my make up and go get a cosmopolitian at a bar somewhere before dinner. I really need a few today. Getting older SUCKS, especially when you are alone. Wish me luck.

meow

I am going to F****** scream! I just left a team meeting and my schedule will be totally changed! I want to quit and move back to New Orleans. How do I even attempt to explain this? First, I teach 6th grade Literature. We have 2 teams in the sixth grade. Each team has about 150 students. We have a magnet program here where exceptional students go to Spanish rather than Literature. SO I get about 100 of the 150 on my team. Well, I cross team with the other Literature teacher...I gave her 20 of my kids during her small classes. She gave me 20 of her kids during my small classes. We did this 2 weeks ago. She and I teach VERY differently! She's considered HITLER if that gives you any idea! My kids beg me to come back to my class. Of course I gave her some of the challenging students...she is so mean that she can usually straighten out the bad apples, or at least they fear her.
Well an hour ago I find out I am getting my 20 back... =( and my classes will change and GOd Almighty now I will be teaching a class of Language Arts. Which for me means more planning and more paperwork...and I want to just jump ship.
Let me add to it...I teach Literature...we have Literature workbooks...Well my new Language Arts teacher who has Grammar workbooks tells me she has already used several stories out of the Lit workbook that I teach from. OK, how else can I let off steam today??? My materials are being used, my classes are changing and now I have to find more work, retrain my kids, add new lesson plans and lose what is left of my mind in the process.
It didn't help that I couldn't sleep last night and hit snooze 7 times this morning, eventually getting out of bed at 7:45 and made it to school and my classroom for 8:15. I knew I should have stayed in bed this am. I just knew it! It doesn't help that I make 36 tomorrow and I am feeling really alone.

Hiss***

I can't sleep! I mean damn I have spent the last 2 hours in bed tossing and turning. I am so going top hurt in 4 hours...I need to go la la land in order to make it tomorrow with 100 kids!

I made reservations at my favorite restaurant this for Dinner this Friday...Thanks for all the B-day wishes but it's this Friday the 25th....I wasn't feeling exactly great about a new year of life taken away from me...I mean hell Social Security (if there is any money left) here I come! But my buddy Tommy kept on and on about me needing to see a few people, rather than sitting around after work and picking out my headstone.

IS their a secret to eternal youth? (besides lying???)

me*

Well, if I have to turn another year older...at least I will try to pamper myself a bit in the process of going to an old folks home...My aunt brought her maid "Glossy" over to my house today as a treat for me..(yeah!!) After work I went to get a manicure and a pedicure...my feet feel better and my house is cleaner! How can I be upset?

Emerils cooking for N'awlins people or N'awlins dishes all week...Check him out. On the anniversary for Hurricane Katrina some restraunts are donating proceeds to Nawlins...so stay tumed and if yu can EAT out next week! August 29 is the day Katrina destroyed so many people and their lives and homes in my beloved city.

Here's a pic of my one of my kitties. Her name is Whisper. She is my newest edition. She's been part of my family for over a year now. She is just starting to come around affectionatly. She was VERY stand offish for the first 9 months...I mean I have NEVER had a kitty that wasn't a lap baby...So I hope she continues to come around!

......

Wow! I hit snooze several times this morning. I fell asleep watching the Saints vs. Dallas last night. Lets just say Da Saints didn't do all that well. =(

I am wishing I had peace and what feels like attainable goals in my life right now. I have done really well on my diet for 10 days now...I'm not getting on a scale until I think I won't be discouraged. Still send me good vibes of self control with exercise and food.

I went looking for a tanning salon after Walmart last night. The one that was supposed to be near me and have stand up tanning....apparently closed. =(
I also called and tried to make a hair appointment this week to get my highlights touched up. Well, she can only see me Friday or next week. I took the next week appointment.

I am still thinking about K. I want to call him and find out what are going on in his head right now. I guess it is the Virgo nature in me to want to have some control over my life...and well...I feel totally helpless. Anybody reading this a Libra? If so, what are your pet peeves? I know Libras don't like to be backed into a corner, or put on the spot.

How long?

If you were in a relationship that did not work out...and you considered yourself serious...and the other person really screwed with your feelings...How long before you would think about dating?

thoughts

K scroll down, look at pics..and then please comment on the regrets* post. Thank you!

Well after seeing these pics, I think I have finally realized that I have to lose some weight. I also desperately need a tan. I have always been fair, and my mom used to spend lots of time on Pensacola beach...she has since ended up with tons of skin cancer. I have stayed away from sun for skin cancer reasons and the fact that I hate to be HOT! SO has anyone on here spent anytime in a tanning bed? Comments?

I actually got on my treadmill today and walked over a mile...not much I know, but hey its a start. I have also tried to cut down on my eating portion size and no eating after 7. Wanna send me self control vibes?

Lots of pics added today!

I love Brooks and DUNN

Regrets?

How many regrets are we supposed to feel in a life time? Are we to pass on our knowledge to others...or stew in our own thoughts? Are we EXPECTED to grow from them or have them hang over our head until we are literally hanging by a thread?

Are regrets supposed to make us think about mistakes, or just *caution* us when we are about to make a right or left turn on a one way street?

One of the cities top dining establishments

Kurt and I had dinner here and ended up closing the place...it really was a good evening!

Ok Yummy man he is!

HAVE I TOLD YA'LL I LOVE THIS MAN???

!

I have lots of thoughts about Kurt. One, should be protecting myself...the other should be am i being realistic or just dreamy? How much time do you generally need to get over a relationship?

I am catching my self off guard in the last month to six weeks I am really wanting to play HOUSE. I mean I will be 36 soon...but never felt like I HAD to settle down. Now, I want to settle down!

Please read yesterdays post and send feedback.

Men

Kinda have a lot on my mind after my trip home. I have been swirling stuff around in my head for a couple of days now. While I was home, Kurt (one of my ex's) joined us in the French Quarter for a few nights. I have only really loved two guys in my life..John, my first who will have my heart and soul until the day I die, and Kurt. Ironically, one of the times John and I broke up Kurt and I started dating. We used to run within the same circles and shared several of the same friends. John and Kurt were not exactly buddies but were polite to each other on my account. Anyway, Kurt and I always stay in touch, whether a month or 4 months pass, we can always pick up where we left off. Our problem was I was ready to settle down and he wasn't. I truly think he felt like I did with John, I had goals and wanted to accomplish several of them before I even thought about marriage. Well, in the last year Kurt had been dating a girl we'll call T. He was serious enough that they considered moving in together. This is HUGE news for Kurt...He's not a player BY ANY MEANS..He has slept with under a handful of women and he's 37. OK well, about 2 months ago Kurt called me a got my voicemail and left a message; he was crying...Pretty upset. He's very guarded with his emotions...So for this to happen, he's lost it. I managed to get him a few hours later and we talked. T had apparently really led him on and had told him several lies and really screwed him over. At this point, he's feeling frustrated and kinda confused as there hasn't been any closure on his part with her.

Well, Friday night he and I went to Antoines for dinner. If I had to pick the top 3 Na'wlins eateries, it is in the top 2. We spent 3 hours at dinner. We spent the next two days together...with Linda and Kevin at the hotel. Well, Saturday late afternoon...my hormones were raging...and after several drinks...I just kinda broke down. I told him I wanted to just kick the shit out of him for finally feeling "ready" and it was with someone else. I mean Kurt has 90% of what I want. The other 10% I can work out. He's got a college degree in Art no less. He considered teaching at one point..but currently does graphic design. We share a love for New Orleans and for Music. We think alike politically. We just seem to have a pretty good friendship base. As his response to me was "Rebecca it's our timing that was the problem". He said he knew this conversation would happen one day and was glad I said something now. Ladies, I was total water works during this convo. I mean I keep asking myself WHAT AM I DOING WRONG?

He told me not to wait for him. He knows I am dating a guy here..Lew. I told him everything, and I know anything I wanna know about T. Is it weird that he and I can talk about other people we are seeing and still sleep together? It was wonderful. I can't explain it, it was serene, peaceful yet sensous. I haven't stopped thinking about him since I drove away Sunday afternoon.

I am so OCD!

Hurricane Relief

I have tons to say...but not all the time in the world to say it! I am under the weather feeling crappy! Sinus/sore throat/headache....UGHHHHHH I'm taking meds and going home to crawl into bed....early!

My trip was a success! I will post pictures soon...I managed to get pics with Brian McKnight, Dr. Phil, Dr. Phils son (who got married the day after to a playboy model no less) Jeff Foxworthy and my guys Brooks and Dunn. I was such a nut! They were late to the party....But I was the first person they saw when they walked thru the doors. All I could manage to get out of my mouth to Ronnie was "I LOVE YOU"...he walked over and huged me, then I said again..."I LOVE YOU"...he did a little dance, I damn near lost my mind. I got 2 pics with them...The preshow party was cool...they fed us N'awlins stuff like muffelattas, stuffed shrimp, and gumbo in a martini glass! They also had fresh fruit and an open bar with red and white wine....The people who purchased the first 6 rows were given a bag of goodies...A few books (one by Dr. Phils wife, one about the devastation and photos of Hurricane Katrina), a Dr. Phil coffee cup, A DVD of Blue Collar Comedy, Cd's by Brian, Allen Toussiant, and Brooks and Dunn...A baseball cap and other goodies...My tickets could not have been better. I had 3rd row center. I took over 150 pictures...The stage was set up with a backdrop of St. Louis Cathedral (The most beautiful church I have ever been in...and where I Hope* Dream* and Pray* to get married) and they designed 2 balconies on each side...It was really a good job! I have no regrets on the money I spent, it was worth every penny! The money goes back to the City employees who stayed and worked during this time of crisis. My city is rebuilding and slowly....very slowly getting back on it feet. Keep those prayers alive!

Positive thoughts ( I know I need them)

This should probably be taped to your bathroom mirror where one could read it every day. You may not realize it, but it's 100% true.

1. There are at least two people in this world that you would die for.
2. At least 15 people in this world love you in some way.
3. The only reason anyone would ever hate you is because they want to be just like you.
4. A smile from you can bring happiness to anyone, even if they don't like you.
5. Every night, SOMEONE thinks about you before they go to sleep.
6. You mean the world to someone.
7. You are special and unique.
8. Someone that you don't even know exists loves you.
9. When you make the biggest mistake ever, something good comes from it.
10. When you think the world has turned its back on you take another look.
11. Always remember the compliments you received. Forget about the rude remarks.

So........If you are a loving friend, send this to everyone, including the one that sent it to you. If you get it back, then they really do love you.

And always remember....when life hands you Lemons, ask for tequila and salt and ask me over!

I'm OFF!

Well, I felt better this morning knowing that I will not be at work tomorrow, but with my oldest and dearest friend...in the city that I LOVE...with FABULOUS music( and comedy)...Great food...and some down time.

Yes, I know I just came off of summer break...but I've been working for 2 weeks now.... =(

I hope to leave right after school today....and not sure where I'll stay tonight...I have a few options. I am looking forward to going to www.Antoines.com and www.galatoies.com and Acmeoyster.com....BBQ shrimp po-boys....crawfish pies with an ettoufee sauce...grilled oysters, Bannanas Foster, Bread Pudding..Ok I know I will gain 20 pounds on this trip and worth EVERY bite!!!!!

Hiss***

I'm still feeling overwhelmed at school.....It's hard when you have so many kids and don't know all of their names...and unfortunately the names you are know are the ones whose behavior has stuck out and you have had to talk to them. I want to look forward to my road trip tomorrow nigt but feel totally unprepared here at school!

Again send me soothing, calming and positive vibes...
Thanks

!!!!!!

3 adjectives to describe my day- chaotic, frustrating, unbalanced

3 for how I feel...Exhausted, frustrated, overwhelmed

It was the first day with students...The kids were ok, I guess. However, the new schedule for 6th grade SUCKS ...And I feel like I have no time for anything! Leaving Wed after school to drive home is a bit much at this stage....plans and organization is really a nightmare the first week of school. I wanna SCREAM...

Ok and how was your day?

One a final note...the guy that I teach with that I have such a crush on...very married just added to his appeal YET again...last week he mentioned to me he has over 200 acres in the country (yes, I really want 5 or 10 one day).....we walk out of a faculty meeting today and he says well Rebecca...are you going home? I said I can't we have a quick dept meeting downstairs...so in turn I ask how about you? He says "Well, I have two beautiful women waiting for me at home, my daughter and my wife. I swear my daughter reminds me more and more of my lovely wife." After 25+ years of marriage....I am crying out loud to find my own man this close to perfect! I mean damn...why do I have to fall for some one so totally OFF LIMITS??????
SCREAM

Yawn

Kinda sleepy now....I slept til 11...I was up late watching a movie with Alec Baldwin(the only Baldwin brother that I adore)...called "The Cooler"...It was about Casino life...on IFC. This afternoon I ran to Dillards to pick up some Estee Lauder mascara....went in a tye dye tshirt and shorts mind you...one of the girls at the counter is from New Orleans..We started chatting again and she got me to stay for their regional manager to give me a make over....Mind you it's tax free weekend for back to schoolers the mall was INSANE! I ended up buying some eyeshadow to go with the mascara---they were in gift. Then I drove over to school to see if our principal had schedules out yet...Nope! We get kids Monday but no idea what classes, names and such....I did hang a few more posters and cleared out my box...and ran to aunties house....I'm still looking at the makeup job from Lauder in the mirror. I came in typed up a few pages of school procedures and such...and need to get my happyself ready for my trip Wed night...I'm worried about getting everything together for the sub on Thurs/Fri...I have no list of kids to leave her, or schedules, or times to take kids places...I have a few lessons pulled together but not typed...Need to pack...Thought about trying to get my hair taken care of here....but I doubt I'll have time...much less money. I can pray My schedule and Dawn's will allow for it. Tomorrow, I start to pack, get a disposable camera, and figure out what in the hell I can wear to try to make me look skinny in front of Ronnie Dunn...Like I have a chance in hell with a married guy with his heavenly voice...but Hey I wann try to look *purty* =)
Plus I have a few people I wanna see while I am home....but not sure how that will work out. So send me soothing, calming vibes, with a touch of organizational skills thrown in....for the next week.

THANKS!

*mmmm mmm good

I'm cooking a big pot of N'awlins red Beans and Rice...they are simmering on the stove..I'm flipping channels and loving on my kitties....I'm broke and can't go anywhere! Send me a good man and the winning lotto numbers....I'm not asking for much.

friday

Well, I had the day off...and productive, I was not. Relaxed, sleepy and in control of the remote are much better labels.

Feeling kinda weird about having to go back to work. Wishing at least one of the two of my friends were still co-workers.

Hoping to find the love of my life to where I feel engulfed with happiness, joy and a friendship to last a lifetime. ...Praying God will point him out...and soon.

Totally broke...and hating the blazing heat outside...I feel like the earth is getting closer and closer to hell.

OCD

Well, still no air at school. MISERY! This has been every day this week. SCREAM

I worked really late well...7:00 pm after getting here at 7:30 with no air is LATE for me...but one of my favorite students froma couple of years ago....came to see me yesterday afternoon and wanted to help! So I jumped and said yes. Her mom and brother were here...her mom is a bit odd. My student we will call K...Is so very bright, a talented writer and artist. She has been hurting herself at home. She had a welt on her arm...Mom proceeds to tell me she was molested when she was 8 and that K is dropping off grade wise and she's in therapy now. OK well....this is personal info and mom is shouting it from my room....How sad is that for K? It sucks! After we worked inmy room..I took her for pizza...Mom told me how they are on food stamps, hubby is on disability. They were renting from a slum lord...I didn't know her home life was this sad. This weekend, I will clean out my cup board and see if I have some food for them to eat. I look, listen and feel so much empathy for this girl. She's the type so smart, hopefully she will get a scholarship! Pray for her and her family.




YEP, that's my title...I get into these ruts and well...OBSESS...and right now is one of those ruts! Yesterday, being a member of the fan club (Brooks and Dunn) of course...Pre sale tix went on to the show in Atlanta in November...which happens to be on Veterans day and I have NO SCHOOL and its a Friday! Well the first set of tickets I bought were on the left facing the stage...myman Ronnie sings on the right. Well for fear of not getting close I bought them. I kept trying for an hour or so...and finally got them on the right 4th row....So I bought them too. Granted these were 50 dollar tix...the ones on the left were 5th row....so I'm pretty sure I will sell the ones on the left for a profit. If you are not a fan they are country stars...23 #1 hits over the last few years.....and I only discovered them in the last 4 years....

I wanna head down a "Red Dirt Road"

As of tomorrow he's only a week away......"I Believe"...it was actually nominated for Christian single of the year. See my guy does me proud! He just has to sing to me and then catch me as I faint in his presence! He is so talented! It would be sooooo cool if they actually picked me as the N'awlins B & D correspondant! I could win a trip to Vegas in December to see and meet them...all expenses paid. I think I could handle that...

Cross you fingers! "I Believe"!

100th post

Ironic that it is August first and my 100th post....Yeahh blogger....thank you Hannah!
Well, still no Air Conditioning..I saw a school district employee roaming the halls and pleaded with him about no AIR...Those of you who do not know me....need to realize that I cannot FUNCTION without my AC...I will give up several things in life....I will give up chocolate before my AC. I will give up sex before my AC....Are you with me??? Well, after yesterdays power STROKE.my bill at home...All I can come up with was that with the floor guys at my house for almost 2 weeks and leaving doors open in order to cut the wood to size and using a saw they needed to leave 2 of my door open....I like it cool. I sleep with it on 65...but keep it on 68-70 when Im home....So I realize that this is cooler than most...but I'm a big girl and need my cool breeze going on.
Well, Rocketman does too (the guy at school I have the crush on--unfortunately very married)...he's sweating up a storm right along with me....At least I get a great view of him....Damn, he is so close to the perfect man for me...Can't someone free him up?????

HOT and bothered

Had a LONG day...It sucks that it is Ben's bday...and we went back to school today...and we had to go downtown to the civic center and then to school and sit in meets ALL afternoon.....Can I mention without AIR CONDITIONING!!! Then I get home and got my electric bill 311.00 for this last month. The highest it has ever been! This is my 3rd summer in this house and it's never been more than 210.00

HOLY SHIT!

Teatopia and B





Teatopia,Ben, Me and J-Lo out for B's birthday Friday Night out in Columbus Ga....
He hugged the porcelian god for an hour or two the next morning.... our job was complete! =)~

feedback

Wish me luck tomorrow....send feedback

sad

The love of my life and I met today...17 years ago at Univerity of New Orleans Arena. It's a love I will cherish until the day I die...I really wish we had been able to work things out.

I love you John.


"The Dance"

Looking back on the memory of
The dance we shared 'neath the stars above
For a moment all the world was right
How could I have known that you'd ever say goodbye

And now I'm glad I didn't know
The way it all would end the way it all would go
Our lives are better left to chance I could have missed the pain
But I'd have had to miss the dance

Holding you I held everything
For a moment wasn't I a king
But if I'd only known how the king would fall
Hey who's to say you know I might have changed it all

And now I'm glad I didn't know
The way it all would end the way it all would go
Our lives are better left to chance I could have missed the pain
But I'd have had to miss the dance

Yes my life is better left to chance
I could have missed the pain but I'd have had to miss the dance

why not?

No blog comments on the last 2 why not????

Well, I'm on simply reading email as I have about 5 minutes of lunch left...they fed us here at school....and well...I snuck off to read my blog for ideas/comments..and guess what NO ONE WROTE ANY !!!!!

Let me go back to the library and stare at the back of Rocketman's head....unfortunately it's all I got!

read the last 2/3 blog entries

Every fan has wondered, "What would I ask Brooks & Dunn if I got the chance?". Well now you may just have the chance. We are searching for a few Brooks-Dunn.com roving reporters! We need charismatic and creative fans to send in 30 second audition clips from their video phones!. Get creative! Show us you would be the ultimate B&D Entertainment Reporter




RULES & GUIDELINES
You may submit either via a camera phone, or mpg video clip via the email address above. Please remember we are not responsible for lost, damaged, or misdirected clips. You may only submit one interview clip. Please include in your interview clip your name and who you are asking the interview question to AND what show you are planning to attend.



What happens when you receive my submission?

Once Brooks-Dunn.com receives your clip, it is assigned a unique identification number. The submitter's information is entered into our database and the clip is passed to the screening department. Once the tape is screened and confirmed to have all the necessary items listed above, we make a web dub of the interview for our library, and release forms are sent out to the submitter. (See official rules for more on evaluation and release forms).

Pick the one that sounds better

This is another one of the people I could try to interview..If I get chosen for the New Orleans show I could go to Vegas in December with BnD....SO make me sound INCREDIBLE!


"How much influence do you think the local music scene has on up and coming artists? I ask because of the devastating effect that Katrina had on local New Orleans musicians. So many of them were relocated because of losing a home, loved ones and the paycheck that the tourist community supplied them with. If your local music scene had been devastated like N'awlins was...what kinds of ideas would you offer fans of those musicians?"---my ideas (send thoughts)


Trez Gregory
I joined the Brooks & Dunn band in 2005, after working with them on the nationally televised CMA Awards show in the '04. Coming from Ohio to Nashville in 2000, I quickly became part of the local music scene as well as the recording industry. My vocal credits include background vocals on Gretchen Wilson's multi-platinum debut disc and legendary artists, Van Zant's debut country project. I have been consistently performing for the past twenty-five years, touring across the country with local and regional bands

OR
This is another one of the people I could try to interview..If I get chosen for the New Orleans show I could go to Vegas in December with BnD....SO make me sound INCREDIBLE!


How much influence do you think the local music scene has on up and coming artists? I ask because of the devastating effect that Katrina had on local New Orleans musicians. So many of them were relocated because of losing a home, loved ones and the paycheck that the tourist community supplied them with. If your local music scene had been devastated like N'awlins was...what kinds of ideas would you offer fans of those musicians?

OR this guy------

I have to have questions for one the the road team...This is who I am thinking of submitting for.... Additions or Suggestions???? I only have 30 seconds to do this....What could/could really grab his attention?



"What makes you the best tour manager in the business? What attributes make a good manager? What advice would you give prospective managers? What makes you choose a benefit concert? DO you deal with facility managers or do you book with the Artist agencies and supply the available dates? What is the wildest thing a fan or fan(s) have done to meet B and D? "

Scott Edwards
You know my story, some say i am the best tour manager in the business. I have been doing this for 24 years! I won the CMA's Tour Manager of the year in 1996 . Other acts I work with include: Mike Reid, Kathy Mattea, Shenandoah, Tanya Tucker, Mel McDaniel

Thurs

My tummy hurts and I wanna stay home! TOmorrow is 1st day back for teachers...and well..right now I feel like shit. I am supposed to have dinner with Lew tonight...i gotta feel lots better for that to happen....I've got an upset tummy which just makes me GROUCHY! Ughhh

ideas

Yes, I am absolutely wild about Ronnie Dunn...bummer he's married...I worked in a music store while in college( I grew up listening to rock and alternative) and I worked at The N'awlins Superdome for events...and I NEVER listen to country music until I moved to GA. In a months time I went to see George Strait and then Nine Inch Nails in Atlanta...are you understanding my eclectic tastes? I'm not much on female country singers....(I do like Martina McBride, Faith and Sugarland)...but really like them cowboys...Anyway, Something about Ronnie drives me wild. I am still waiting for ideas from you guys on something I could do that would be that MEMORABLE FOR THEM...meeting them for me will be memorable! The concert is a benefit with Jeff Foxworthy, DR. Phil, local N'awlins musicians and Brooks N Dunn headlining. Hey, I'm taking 2 days off of work, driving threw a few states, paid big bucks for a meet n greet with Dr. Phil (could care less about him) and other performers..is all they will tell me. So give me ideas please!
I have tomorrow off...I'm having dinner with Lew...and then Friday back to work MEOW! This weekend in B's birthday....Lord help me! He wants Swinging Richards a gay strip club in Atlanta...Hannah has bailed on me ...so wish me luck! Gay men are usually cute, but what the hell am I gonna do with a room full of them?

HELP ME

I'm up and AWAKE...I have a doc appt early and need to be asleep...but have a fella by the name of Ronnie Dunn on my mind....BrooksnDunn.com has a contest where you can interview them at a gig..You have to submit a quick tape of yourself before the concert you are planning to attend...I bought 2 tix for 1000.00 bucks for the hurrican relief show in my hometown of N'awlins. What would make me stand out in a a sea of applications???? PLEASE SEND your thoughts no matter WHAT they are..interview questions...stuff not usually asked....

flooring

FINALLY, I have finished my home improvement ventures this summer....nothing else this year! Next summer perhaps granite kitchen countertops....only after I pay for these floors! So here are some before and after pics! AMEN----after meaning my house is back in order at least the places my visitors see =)

?

How much sex do women want/need in a week? I'm curious with the different age groups that read my blog, what their responses will be...enlighten me.

Sunday

I have had a busy last few days! Whew! Lunch with friends on Friday at my house...Saturday lunch (Johnny Carrinos---ummm if you have never tried their chocolate cake it is to die for!!!!) Ok I like chocolate but this was as good as an orgasm---I kid you not...they serve it warm with a scoop of ice cream and it truly melts in your mouth OMG!! Can I say lets do it again and again? ) with Tommy for his birthday which is actually to day. He and I spent the day shopping and for me returning a few picture frames I bought in hopes that I could make things work out framing...No luck. After several hours around town we drove to PC to see a church that a coworkers hubby and their youngest daughter go to. I am interested in finding out more about the Catholic faith. Well, 2 of his other friends wanted to go to Houhilahans downtown for dinner. So we met them there (Jeff and Sharon). Sharon goes to that church and has taught classes there. So she said she would go with me and walk me thru a Mass. The last Mass I attended was at St. Louis Cathedral in Jackson Square. I am lost with the ups and downs...and do not know the Hail Mary. The church is small and seems quaint. I think I would be comfy studying there.

Alrighty, today I had Lew over for lunch after church. He teaches Sunday school randomly and today was one of his days to teach. He seemed to like my house and my floors. (yeah) I made some N'awlins food.(as if I cook anything else---once you get to know me) He was still breathing when he left, so guess my cooking didn't kill him! =) He is a nice guy. Very Intelligent...and somewhat jovial once he gets past all of the heart break in his life in the last 2 yrs. Losing a wife and going to counseling with his family, son and daughter in disarray. He asked me to have dinner with him Thursday. He wants to try the chocolate cake I was raving about. His son is at his grandma's this week and comes back this weekend. He will be in 7th grade this year. I brought my aunt and Tommy some left overs...They seemed to be pleased. Tommy wanted a Steak on his actually b'day today. So I went with him to O'Charleys. I had a cup of soup and he got his steak. Now, I am home and plan to channel surf and go thru the mail the rest of the night and tomorrow. I refuse to do ANYTHING of substance except was dishes!

pondering

If you have a new potential long term person to date (ok...this dating would be drawn out a couple of years, mind you) that you do not get benefits with...would you keep your friend with benefits on the side? Why or why not?

How much money is too much to spend on friends for their birthdays? I have a buddy whose b'day is tomorrow..I gave him 45 bucks in gift certificates, and we shopped all day..I paid for lunch and dinner...so actually I spent a little over $100 bucks.

Next weekend is another buddies b'day...and I've got 40 bucks in gift certificates...and he wants me to pay for his dining out..and drinking out. Well, friend 1 has always been a mutual respect you pay, I pay , take turns kind of friend. Friend 2 is ALWAYS expecting me to pay for stuff. On the other hand he has been invaluable to me this summer with my home projects and his time. A I shallow for not wanting to spend $100 on him too?

GIVE ME FEEDBACK PLEASE ~~

Yawn

I am soooooo sleepy! I'm about to crash. Today was nice..I managed to get Hannah outta the house and over to mine...YIPPEE! I had lunch for a few friends. It was good to see them. One will remain a co worker, they other two have left me. One to be a SAHM and the other was transferred to another school. I go back to work in 1 week. MEOW

I'm kinda concerned cause I told my friend A that I could get attached and I think it will send him running for the hills. Funny that another friend one of the few blogs that I read on a regular basis has just posted a cosmo article about friends with benefits.

Why is it so hard for women to separate feelings and sex?

giggle*

My flight was being served by an obviously gay flight attendant, who
seemed to put everyone in a good mood as he served us food and
drinks.

As the plane prepared to descend, he came swishing down the aisle and
told us that "Captain Marvey has asked me to announce that he'll be
landing the big scary plane shortly, so lovely people, if you could
just put your trays up, that would be super."

On his trip back up the aisle, he noticed this well-dressed and
rather exotic looking woman hadn't moved a muscle. "Perhaps you
didn't hear me over those big brute engines but I asked you to raise
your trazy-poo, so the main man can pitty-pat us on the ground."

She calmly turned her head and said, "In my country, I am called a
Princess and I take orders from no one."

To which (I swear) the flight attendant replied, without missing a
beat, "Well, sweet- cheeks, in my country I'm called a Queen, so I
outrank you. Tray-up, Bitch."

Tues

Yep. I accomplished a few more things today. Fred, Charlotte, Glossy and auntie came over at 7:30 a.m. F & C installed my new vertical blinds in my sunroom..all 6 of them. I ran over my new wood floors with a dash of vinegar water ...and did SO MANY household chores..too many to list. I also brought my old computer over to one of my previous year students. She doesn't have one and She came to see me at school yesterday, and mentioned it. So I drove it over to her house today. It's in good shape with speakers/printer/scanner/copier. Her mom can't afford a house phone and they had like 3 broken down cars in the yard...not good. I LOVED this girl, she had the sweetest disposition...not an A student but after meeting mom--she doesn't have much support at home.

B and I installed walk way solar lights outside today...and replaced my rug....and moved around some furniture in my computer room. I wish it was easier for me to get rid of clutter. Thank god, I do not collect magazines like my parents do...I still have too much JUNK!

I am running in and out of cookbooks looking for a fabulous veggie idea to make ofr lunch with the girls this Fri. Hannah, Lisa and B...I am going to make a crab casserole for a first time and see how it comes out. Lisa is baking something...and Ben is thinking of grilling something.

My HG

Several things were accomplished today...I had pictures hung on my walls in my living room, a new toilet seat installed, a new hand towel ring in guest bath installed, I purchased 700.00 dollars worth of vertical blinds to go in my sunroom. They will cover all 6 doors and windows. Lowes didn't have enough, they could cover 4 of the 6...but the other two were larger glass sliding areas and were 240 EACH to be special ordered. Needless to say I went to Home Depot instead and got similar to what I wanted but not my 1st choice.

Why can't I ever get 1st choice in life? Is it that I always want it, or that it seems unattainable?

I also had a dead tree cut down with a chainsaw and cut in pieces and brought to the curb. I purchased some solar lights to put on my front door walkway...I need to put them out this week. I loved on my baby Destiny who I am surprised doesn't HATE me right now for having his back claws removed on Friday. I actually managed to get his antibiotic down...It's a liquid dropper...That alone was a feat. I love him so much I feel SOOO guilty. I would hate me right now.

I am getting sad/nervous/dreadful in relation to going back to work in a week.

?

Well, i had an eventful day. I didn't sleep well. I know I was feeling GUILTY. I took Destiny my oldest kitty to have his hind claws taken out. When I adopted him from the New Orleans Humane society, his front claws were already taken out. Well, my other two babies Harmony and Whisper do not have claws. So, Destiny has always been to an advantage. He's managed to tear my leater sofas some and with the hardwood i just put down...9,500...I thought I better stop this sooner than later. I love my baby, and felt sad and worried all day. I LOVE my Vet, but still. I called and they wanted him to stay overnight tonight. He usually shares a pillow with me....I'll be lonely tonight.

Second, I met a teachers friend for lunch today. A blind date if you will. She was right he was a really nice fella. He looks younger than he is...but I didn't feel a spark. He wants to go out again, I said yes, he would be a nice guy for a friend, but...I want butterflies, fireworks, and friendship all wrapped up in one. I want John. I watched the Notebook...it happened to come on Starz this evening...and i just cried and cried. I want that LOVE. I will never be happy until I feel it again.

Two of my fav guys....

One I would like to kiss the other, I'd like to sing to me! I am eagerly awaiting his CD!! Elliot that is!

*pout*

Well...Emeril had a Nawlins show on the other night and he mentioned a fundraiser for the Crescent City....So i was roaming around on line and found out Dr. Phil is hosting a show with Headliners Brooks and Dunn and the Arena! OMG a few of you know I LOVE RONNIE DUNN"S VOICE...i went country after moving to Ga....and I managed to see them in Atlanta last year...this show will also have New Orleans artists and a meet n Greet if you buy VIP tickets...can i SCREAM??? I have 2 favorite singers in my life Steve Perry (Journey) and Ronnie...Well, what bites is it's August 10th. The first week of school for me..not so awful if it was a Friday and not a Thursday. I would have to misss a day and a half...and my principal would frown on our first week with the kids. DAMNIT doesn't Ronnie know all of this????? I mean the tix at 500 each...but I would pay it!

Primary

me

Well, I just got off of my treadmill...something that I need to do on a daily basis...but get too LAZY to do it! I hate the heat and hate to sweat, so I purchased a treadmill about a year ago...and was active on it for the first few months (3-4 times a week for 30 minutes). One day at a time...I saw a 700 lbs woman on TLC last night and I figure if she can have some *hope* why can't I manage to get 50 lbs off?

I worked more on decluttering and organizing after the floor installation. I have yet more to do!

I have the two most important guys in my life birthdays to shop for this month. I was going today to get a few gift certificates, but kitties and magazines took over. So I suppose tomorrow will be my day to run errands and vote early...

When do you not accept an apology? Give me circumstances.

SATC pondering

My parents just left....Well they went to my aunts and will leave there in the early A.m...I am about to completely lose my mind! I love them immensely but.... Their timing on this trip leaves a lot to be desired. I now need a vacation.

I put my dining room back together today and shopped with mom. Dad bought me an external hard drive for home computer and copied stuff for me =)

When are we ever satisfied in life? Is there a road we travel that has a dead end? (no pun)When we realize ok...no more "wants or needs" materialistic or emotional?

.......

I give up

04July06

Spent the day with Mom & Dad & Mildred and B...We had lunch at Mildreds and dinner at Cheddars. Alex called twice....I missed both times...I feel better! This is the guy I like so much but is totally off limits! Pray for Linda's mom she is back in the hospital with B cancer. She really needs Gods help.

July 3

Floor guys finished laying the actual floor. They need to do the quarter round(baseboard bottoms) EVERYWHERE...but they say it will not take long...Jeremy the floor guy will call but my guess is they will have the 4th off(tomorrow), and come back here Wed and finish up with the glue spots along the way...sticky stuff to walk around barefoot on. I cleaned out both of my dressers today and organized all drawers. B helped...he is so good to put up with me. Mom n Dad got here last night, they're at aunties house. I was daring and brought ALex lunch today, just picked up a burger and brought it to him. He gave me a sweet kiss and I left. I am falling hard for this guy and I will only get heart broken...I know!!!!!!!!! I'm an idiot.

deep profound sigh

I'm nuts ! It is official! I really like a married man. I mean I'm crazy about him....I've made bad decisions before...but I think this may be my worst one long term. I'm day dreaming and have lingering thoughts for a married man that I have acted upon. Tell me I will get my heart broken...and Im breaking God's laws.....I'm nuts!

?

Would any of you ever sleep with a married man? Would you take a married man in as a lover??? Why or why not?

Confusion

Well...I had my first date with Lew Thursday night. I am feeling a bit overwhelmed. HE unloaded quite a bit of information...his wife was killed in a car accident in front of him. They were driving back from Florida with their 2 children from her mothers funeral. Tragic and sadness beyond words I just can't imagine. He's a god fearing man (teaches Sunday school). The church has really reached out to him during this trying time. He broke down and teared up at the dinner table. He's a truly sweet and genuine man. His heart has been traumatized. She died in 2004 not sure when...so really it could have been only a year yr and half since she passed. I would imagine the healing process would take tremendous time....

He's a nurse for Blue Cross Blue Shield. He has 36 nurses under his supervision. He really enjoys his job. Intellectually speaking he's definitely on a level playing field. One major concern is our age difference. He has 17 years on me. Physical traits he's grey with a beard, blue eyes and has a belly on him. I think he's handsome.

It kinda surprises me that I am not head over heals..because the guy I work with is his age (taller) and I'd flip for him. So I am asking myself what the hold up is...
Lew called 30 minutes after we left dinner to tell me what a nice time he had. This was Thursday night...He asked if he could call Friday and I said yes at dinner. Well, Friday after my floor guys left, B and I went to see The Devil wears Prada and ran to the grocery store. I was home by 8:30. He had called my cell 3 times (it was turned off from the movie) and left 2 messages on my house phone but had called the house 5 times according to my caller ID. Gotta say I felt OVERWHELMED! He told me it had been almost 20 years since he had been on a date and was really nervous all week about us having dinner. He ordered a glass of white wine ( I assume, for his nerves). So what does anyone else out there think??? Give me feedback.

My mom is ALL over me....if it was up to her we would get married next week. Only because my aunt has known him and the wife for 10 + yrs and knows (he's a good person). I'm a bit reluctant because he seems SO EAGER. It can be flattering, but geeze one day at a time. I did call him back last night. My aunt suggested he might be agonizing . He was, he thought with all that he told me I would never talk to him again. WOW. He also wanted to know if with my parents coming in today could we all have dinner one day this week (including his son). I was SHOCKED. I told him no. I was not that comfortable and or ready for that step just yet. I mean WOW. I need to take a breather and he needs too as well. I told him what a busy week I had in store with flooring guys coming back Monday, my parents in town (at least now they will be at my aunts house---so dad can't bitch about how cool I keep my house).I told them mom, dad, and auntie they can't come over until I get my house presentable again. That will be at least Wednesday, furniture, knick knacks, candles, china, pictures, phones, tv, dvd, stereo, dining room set, kitchen table, recliners, ETC. Good lord has this been an experience!!!!!!!!!!

SEND THOUGHTS ON the Lew situation please!

Movies

My buddy B and I went to see The Devil wears Prada...It was a funny movie! I got caught up with all of the fashion moments! To think of the money that is actually had in the fashion industry...ohhh and some of the timeless lines such as Chanel and Lagerfield....Guess you could say I was foaming...So many SATC references if your not a Vogue subscriber...B didn't know Dolce and Gabbana, Jimmy Choo, Mark Jacobs, Versace....I was mesmerized...and they went to fashion week in Paris. Most girls would only dream of it...(I used too! )

Cheers* It was a good movie!