A family is at the dinner table. The son asks his father, "Dad, how many kinds of boobs are there? The father, surprised, answers, "Well, son, there are three kinds of breasts.
In her 20s, a woman's breasts are like melons, round and firm.
In her 30s to 40s, they are like pears, still nice but hanging a bit.
After 50, they are like onions". "Onions?" "Yes, you see them and they make you cry."
This infuriated his wife and daughter so the daughter said, "Mum, how many kinds of 'willies' are there?"
The mother, surprised, smiles and answers, "Well dear, a man goes through three phases.
In his 20s, his Willy is like an oak tree, mighty and hard.
In his 30s and 40s, it is like a birch, flexible but reliable.
After is 50s, it is like a Christmas tree". "A Christmas tree?" "Yes - dead from the root up and the balls are just for decoration."
Well, it's New Years Eve and I have just finished FOLDING CLOTHES! Wahoooooo...oh the excitement. It's so hard to contain myself. I have another warm load in the dryer. I mean it doesn't get any better than this....
"Sad but True" as James Hetfield would say. I spent the day cooking and throwing some shit away. I need to do soooooooo much more! I cooked a meatloaf, a hashbrown casserole, peas, and black eyes peas. I have food for a week. Knowing that I go back to school day after tomorrow, I wanted to have some dinners to nibble on. My Saints played their second string guys and we LOST.
I did treat myself to a mani and pedi last this eve...I mean what the hell else did I have planned???!!!! I thought G might call and wanna do something. NOPE
T invited me to Buffalo's with him and a bud...A invited me over to her parents place...I wanted to be all warm and snuggly with a guy tonight. It's rainy here and VERY HUMID....ICK
GUess I am gonna have to settle for DESTINY my only male kitty....He's my heart and soul anyway...he never lets me down.
For some reason Blogger will not let me post any pics my last 2 posts..GRRRRRR
Happy FUCKIN New Year.